I couldn’t fight sleep off, and I just woke up right now from my “nap.” And right after I type this, I’m going to doze right off like the little baby that I am. But it has occurred to me that I waste a lot of time. I waste a lot of time hesitating. Sometimes the hesitation comes from being scared of the results, or being scared of being assertive, or being scared of moving on. Because I’m scared of what’s next, and I’m a classic self-saboteur. If I feel myself happy, I waste my time waiting for the bomb squad. In classic Vanessa-fashion. But I have wasted my time committing to change, where if there was such a commitment then there wouldn’t be heartache. Would there? So I’m gonna stop wasting my time on things that just plain waste my time. Let’s face the facts. I know what’s right. I know what I need to do. And I know…there’s just no room for some things in my life. So I need to just cut that shit out, for my own personal growth. 

What am I talking about? Figure it out.